I WILL NEVER UNDERSTAND.

I will never understand what it’s like to be a little girl and turn on the TV and not see anyone who looks like me or my family, except for two shows a week after 8pm (if I’m lucky)

I will never understand what it’s like to walk into a store to buy a birthday card and not see anyone who looks like the person I’m buying it for in the drawings

I will never understand the feeling of going to work after washing and combing the hair I was born with and being told I have to go fix it because it doesn’t look professional

I will never understand the added fear of having a son - outside of the fear that he might fall and break something or the cops might hold him overnight for getting caught with pot (and we will laugh about it after and tell him it's fine, because it will be)

I will never understand being underrepresented on magazine covers and movies

I will never understand being called a terrorist because of how I look or because of my religion that I hardly even practice (who knows, maybe I'll get back into being Catholic one day)

What I do understand, is that I will never understand. That is okay and I am not meant to.

I also understand that to many, my voice is still listened to first - so when will I use it?

To use when people I love make remarks that don't serve us because they don’t want to admit that they’ll really just never fully understand.

To say that if you don’t understand that none of what’s going on in the world right now is NEW, but is only getting more exposed because of our technology, then it’s time to broaden our understanding of the people who are in pain and LOVE HARDER.

This has got to hit a point where more people who will never understand are going to say ENOUGH- I am not a stand for this.

I understand that sometimes it takes tragedy for people to get their shit together and that is how it works. But how many years do we need?

I understand that I need to turn off the news and actually TALK to the people that DO understand. To ask questions and be curious.

And I understand that it’s pretty damn simple to tell what feels right, fair and humane and what feels wrong and archaic.

So please, for love, try to understand just ONE person today through your assumptions.

It’s okay to not fully understand.
- 7/7/16